Thursday, December 16, 2010
when one loses his hair, does he really lose his mind?
No, seriously, i want to know that. Does that guy lose his mind along with the hair? Because it appears mine has developed Alzheimer's over night. He suddenly can't remember a fucking thing. Blames things on me that he did, says he knows nothing of some things that I have only told him atleast 3 times over the last year. WHY AM I GETTING SCREAMED AT? I really at this point want a room of my own, a life of my own, and my own piece of mind. And Peace. I did forget to mention PEACE. I am sick of getting bitched at by someone that is unemployed, who promised to take care of all the financial aspects of this marital deal, and now is suddenly pulling back and stating so proudly like a puffed up rooster that "I NEVER NE-VER said that". Oh yeah, right, it was so unbelievable at the time that this girl actually made a mental note in her brain, and continued to lose her brain function with each child she popped out. OMFG, what did I allow to happen. I know one thing is for sure, I am going back to school probably summer time, since the spring lineup has been made. And I know another thing, if I leave him, in my CAR MY OWN CAR, i will leave with my dignity, and I will take this damn laptop. He's not going to have it for his own purpose.
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Look at this
Look at this peaceful setting for a damn blog, look at this peaceful damn setting. Did you know all I wanted to do was to be free of all this peacefulness of being married? How hard is that to fathom? What am I married to a guy with early alzheiimer's diesease or a guy that likes to pay eff you with my mind? you know this blog doens't want to be written since it keep deleting everything I say.
Let's say this simple. I am married to a dumbass that thinks he can play mind games with the best, that would be me in the relationship, and he is loosing. And 2 i am not your damn maid. What the hell would happen to you if i died or ran away? How would you eat? or feed yourself, or do your laundry, or write a damn check for that matter. Tomorrow is my daughter's 20'th birthday, and it's just sad that he thinks that he has to TRY to make this girl feel like she has run everyone off. I have not run off my kids, but HE HAS. I respect the right to privacy, for my kids, something he knows nothing of.
He can call me stupid, all he wants, but one day, when i get out of here, without warning, and he knows not where i have gone, he is going to look like the stupid one. Let's just say nothing has changed in the last 3 months, except my willingness to accept that i do deserve happiness and that i need to go on. And i will.
Weird last night, i was bound to get my hair cut, but everywhere i went had a 45 minute wait, so i didn't cut my long hair. Which has grown 3 inches since that picture you see, easily. Maybe it's a sign. dont' cut your hair.
And maybe the "check engine light" is a sign for his eye to check the engine of the cares my kids drive, instead of him yelling, DON'T DRIVE IT, YOU ARE GONNA EXPLODE THE ENGINE! OMFG! Get a damn grip, and fix it dude. Or isn't that what dudes do anymore? While he is at 46 having a midlife crisis, thinking someone 20 is going to have anything to do with "mounting baldy", he should be making sure his offspring are ok, and i am so pissed about this.
Meanwhile, all you kids that want a fix of jewelery, keep it up, because mama wants to go live in Hawaii permanently,
Let's say this simple. I am married to a dumbass that thinks he can play mind games with the best, that would be me in the relationship, and he is loosing. And 2 i am not your damn maid. What the hell would happen to you if i died or ran away? How would you eat? or feed yourself, or do your laundry, or write a damn check for that matter. Tomorrow is my daughter's 20'th birthday, and it's just sad that he thinks that he has to TRY to make this girl feel like she has run everyone off. I have not run off my kids, but HE HAS. I respect the right to privacy, for my kids, something he knows nothing of.
He can call me stupid, all he wants, but one day, when i get out of here, without warning, and he knows not where i have gone, he is going to look like the stupid one. Let's just say nothing has changed in the last 3 months, except my willingness to accept that i do deserve happiness and that i need to go on. And i will.
Weird last night, i was bound to get my hair cut, but everywhere i went had a 45 minute wait, so i didn't cut my long hair. Which has grown 3 inches since that picture you see, easily. Maybe it's a sign. dont' cut your hair.
And maybe the "check engine light" is a sign for his eye to check the engine of the cares my kids drive, instead of him yelling, DON'T DRIVE IT, YOU ARE GONNA EXPLODE THE ENGINE! OMFG! Get a damn grip, and fix it dude. Or isn't that what dudes do anymore? While he is at 46 having a midlife crisis, thinking someone 20 is going to have anything to do with "mounting baldy", he should be making sure his offspring are ok, and i am so pissed about this.
Meanwhile, all you kids that want a fix of jewelery, keep it up, because mama wants to go live in Hawaii permanently,
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
OK I now have something to say to vent
I now have something to say here and it's a vent. I make jewelery, I am proud of what I make, if it looks like diamonds to me, then that is how I look at it. But you people that go in and type in stupid assed comments li"no, not beautiful at all", or I don't like this, or "???????????????????" yeah, that was actually typed into one of the pieces I made that I am very proud of. IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT, DON'T BOTHER TO COMMENT. I wished, if you had your own listings on Yardsellr, that I could find your shit, and critique it. You dumb assed fucks! Get over yourself and get a life. Atleast, if I see something I regard as cheap, or "made in china", that you have the nerve to post up for sale, obviously something you bought, I don't make an ass out of myself and write nasty comments down, just because I can, because I am some sort of a bully behind the laptop screen. Saying that, I needed to vent that off my chest. No, I am not thin skinned, it's just that FFS, playing a Facebook Game with you people, just so you can find me in the real world, attempting to try to live my dream, I would like to say to you, get a REAL life, and stop hiding behind your facebook profile, cuz, bitches, i know where you are on facebook, and I am NOT afraid to follow your ass there and make a rude comment on how little life you do have.
For those that oooh and ahhhh, and so pretty, thank you. I know the economy is tough, but if you want to buy, don't ask me a thousand questions, then never reply back. I appreciate the praise, but don't waste my time trying to get my beading creations down to a buck, because I sell them for atleast what the beads and items to make them cost. My time is not even accounted for. I suggest, if you are going to tell me "not worth the money", then YOU OBVIOUSLY don't know anything about beads or how much they cost.
Ok, so,I'm in a lather now.
One other pet peeve, I cannot stand. People saying they are Native Americans (Indians), calling me a dirty blood, because my blood is mixed in with european blood. I am Cherokee, we come in all colors and looks, Not everyone has black hair, brown eyes and very tan skin coloring. I am who I am, and that is it. I don't sit there, with red hair, blue eyes, freckles and call myself a Lakota, refer to myself as an elder, or a shaman. Like someone I know. I am just me, a Cherokee, and I can prove it, I can trace my roots back, I have the pictures of my family. No my grandmother was not an indian princess. How stupid are you? There are no Indian Princess' ladies, except for the ones that wax poetic on Pocohantis. Don't call me a member of the wannabe tribe. And yell, HEYA AND AHO! Yes, people there is racism behind the buckskin curtain. And if you are going to whine about how badly the United States government treats Indians, then get involved with a group like AIM, make your voice heard. Otherwise, don't bitch. Don't come to my facebook page and make snide stupid assed remarks. Oh yeah, it's Christmas, and if I want to celebrate it with a damn tree and jingle bells and the like, I will. Do not bother to tell me "i don't celebrate that European Pagan holiday". And if Indians are not Pagan, they need to take a look at Pagans and see how similar the belief system is. It's nature based. THATS RIGHT PEOPLE, I SAID IT. And come off the high horse pretending to "know" something bad is in the air, we all know, EVERY RACE KNOWS that there are global climate changes. Do not attempt to act like an internet Shaman. I still remember that new age guy that led those people to their deaths in Arizona in a "sweat lodge" he had no business running. Even being Native myself, I would not go into one of these, because of my health issues. It's common sense, obviously those that went and were afraid of being berated by some snake oil saleseman, could not think for themselves or value their own lives. Listen to your heart, listen to the beat of the drum, follow your instincts, that should be good enough.
Whew, that felt way better to write that down.
For those that oooh and ahhhh, and so pretty, thank you. I know the economy is tough, but if you want to buy, don't ask me a thousand questions, then never reply back. I appreciate the praise, but don't waste my time trying to get my beading creations down to a buck, because I sell them for atleast what the beads and items to make them cost. My time is not even accounted for. I suggest, if you are going to tell me "not worth the money", then YOU OBVIOUSLY don't know anything about beads or how much they cost.
Ok, so,I'm in a lather now.
One other pet peeve, I cannot stand. People saying they are Native Americans (Indians), calling me a dirty blood, because my blood is mixed in with european blood. I am Cherokee, we come in all colors and looks, Not everyone has black hair, brown eyes and very tan skin coloring. I am who I am, and that is it. I don't sit there, with red hair, blue eyes, freckles and call myself a Lakota, refer to myself as an elder, or a shaman. Like someone I know. I am just me, a Cherokee, and I can prove it, I can trace my roots back, I have the pictures of my family. No my grandmother was not an indian princess. How stupid are you? There are no Indian Princess' ladies, except for the ones that wax poetic on Pocohantis. Don't call me a member of the wannabe tribe. And yell, HEYA AND AHO! Yes, people there is racism behind the buckskin curtain. And if you are going to whine about how badly the United States government treats Indians, then get involved with a group like AIM, make your voice heard. Otherwise, don't bitch. Don't come to my facebook page and make snide stupid assed remarks. Oh yeah, it's Christmas, and if I want to celebrate it with a damn tree and jingle bells and the like, I will. Do not bother to tell me "i don't celebrate that European Pagan holiday". And if Indians are not Pagan, they need to take a look at Pagans and see how similar the belief system is. It's nature based. THATS RIGHT PEOPLE, I SAID IT. And come off the high horse pretending to "know" something bad is in the air, we all know, EVERY RACE KNOWS that there are global climate changes. Do not attempt to act like an internet Shaman. I still remember that new age guy that led those people to their deaths in Arizona in a "sweat lodge" he had no business running. Even being Native myself, I would not go into one of these, because of my health issues. It's common sense, obviously those that went and were afraid of being berated by some snake oil saleseman, could not think for themselves or value their own lives. Listen to your heart, listen to the beat of the drum, follow your instincts, that should be good enough.
Whew, that felt way better to write that down.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)